For My Mother on Mother’s Day
One of the earliest memories I have of my mother is on what I think is my 2nd or 3rd birthday. We were living in the apartments in San Jose. Because it was my birthday – my mother had taken me to the grocery store to pick out a cake mix (she would never in a million years make a cake mix now – and I suspect, that even then, she was doing it because I must have insisted) – any one that I wanted. This decision quite delighted me, and I looked them over with care, and selected the pink cherry cake, with pink cherry frosting. We made the purchase and went home to make the cake – I was completely thrilled – and soon enough, there was a pink two layer cake with pink frosting, and it looked to my untrained eyes just like the one on the box.
This was going to be “good stuff” – Soon there were children assembled to come over to our small home to enjoy my birthday cake with me – Here is the thing about those children, I had no idea who they were. I have no idea to this day how she found them – they must have come from church or something – but they came and sang happy birthday to me, and crowded around the table that we had in that small apartment kitchen – and then it was time to cut the cake – and here is the deal – I don’t like cherry cake, or cherry icing. So my mother had gone to all that trouble to make the cake I wanted for my birthday and I took maybe one bite, and then wasn’t even going to eat it. But she wasn’t even mad at me. It just rolled off her back, and I am sure she laughed about it later.
That is the thing about my mother – she is a planner, and she is excellent at execution, she has great vision and eye, and always knows how to do things the “right” way for the moment, but if it all falls apart – she doesn’t fall apart – she rolls with it. Even as I, or the people who know her best, can watch her mind take a moment – to make it okay in her head. Then it is a smile, and moving on….
My mother……
- Made breakfast for me every day of my entire life until I moved out of the house, and I even then when I come home, she makes breakfast for me. She also made dinner!
- Dropped everything she was doing to come to my side every time I needed her ie: Keaton skiing accident, Kennedy newborn hospitalization or subsequent hospital stays, - I am actually reminded of that Indigo girls song that goes “When I needed my mother and I called her – she stayed with me for days”
- Planned, paid for and executed – not only my first wedding but my 2nd one – and both were absolutely perfect!!
- Makes me laugh!
- Is completely beautiful!
- Always has a calm and peaceful home
- Took me on bus rides, train rides, skiing, hiking and adventures when I was a kid.
- Made my favorite meal for my birthday every year without fail.
- Made my Halloween costumes, and Easter dresses from Scratch and they were always the best.
- Would occasionally pack me a lunch for school, and would always write me little love notes on my napkin to tell me things special about me.
- Thinks I am so funny
- Is the greatest grandmother – she always brings love and new experiences into my children’s lives.
- Used to make play dough and I would have fun with it for hours.
- Has always pursued her passions – and thus – they have become our passions – I have my love of art because of my mother.
- Used to read books to me most nights before bed, even when I was in 5th and 6th grade – I loved sitting with my mother and listening to her read.
- Drove all the way to Pocatello, Idaho and spent the night in a hotel just to see Jorri perform in a play.
- Comes to the kids events; baseball, karate tournament, football, etc.
- Always volunteered to be a room mother at school. She also went to each and every parent teacher conference and made notes and then came home and gave me a “good news is and you need to work on”….briefing
- Always took the collect calls, and difficult calls where I was delivering bad news – and no matter what I said – she still loved me.
- Carpooled to and from, I don’t know how many dance lessons, recitals, performances – swim meets and she was always out in the audience and was always cheering for me.
- Made sure that if there was something that was important to me, that somehow, someway I would get it.
- Took me across the country on 20 dollars a day, and across Europe on 30
- Put up with door slamming, name calling, big attitude, arguing that never seemed to end, entitlement, expectations, and bossy-ness and still loved me.
- Limited the amount of TV I watched and always had wheat bread in the house – because it was good for me.
- Is a great story listener
- Never has a bad thing to say about anyone – which is a good balance to me – because – well we all know that.
- Loves my husband
- Flirts with salesmen that work in retail
- Helped me deliver 2 babies – and raise 3.
- Gave me a roof over my head long after I should have been putting a roof over my own.
- Cries when I cry
- Takes me to the beach every year
- Throws me baby showers, going away, coming home, and “you did it parties”
- Brings me flowers in the hospital
- Gets tickets to the concert, game, event, etc.
- Takes an interest in……
- Worries about me when I travel alone
- Prays for me
- Loves me with her whole heart –
When I was 19 years old – I was definitely the girl who was playing with fire. I was living in Arizona with my friend Jenn Hawkins. I remember going to the grocery store and standing in front of the pregnancy tests and trying to figure out which one to buy. A stranger walked by and recommended one to Jenn and I. Jenn was being strong. She grabbed it – and walked up to the counter and paid. I was in a fog the whole way home to take the test, praying that it would all work out. I remember going into the apartment bathroom and sitting on the toilet and reading the instructions thoroughly – I may have even read them in Spanish – after following them carefully – I put the test on the counter and went out to sit down and watch TV, trying to help my mind stop racing while the time went by. After about 5 minutes – I walked into the bathroom and with major butterflies in my stomach – I looked down at the test. Positive – not even faintly positive – Boldly Positive! It was confirmation of what I already knew – I was going to have a baby. Jenn did her best to console me and give me alternative reasons for the positive – but it was positive – and I knew it in my body.
Without taking even a moment to consider what would happen – I sat down on the couch, grabbed the phone and called my mother.
“Mom?” – (I was starting to feel like I was going to throw up, and not make it through the call)
“Hello Jennifer (excited to hear from me) – How are you?”
“I’m okay – I have something to tell you, and you might want to sit down” – (I was not going to beat around the bush with this – the direct approach is all I had)
“Okay – What is it?”
“I’m pregnant” (There I said it – it’s out there)
“Oh, (pause) Are you okay?”
“I’m really sick mom”
“Uh huh – I actually just came home from a church meeting about unwed pregnancy – so this is perfect timing”
“Okay” – (Me slightly stunned by the direction this had gone)
“Jennifer – It will be okay, we will figure this out, I love you!”
I honestly have no idea how we got off the phone at that point – but two things had happened. I had called my mom and told her the news, and she had heard the news, and still loved me. There was no yelling, no making me feel bad for my decisions, or lack of judgment – just immediate support and love. Without that moment, without that support, I would not have the life and family I have today.
My mother is the blueprint of how to do things right. She is the standard that I hold myself too, and most often come up short. She is the one who’s opinion matters, who I want to make happy and proud. If all the mothers in the whole world were lined up and I could pick any one I wanted. I would pick her, hands down – each and every time – without hesitation, and with my whole heart.
I love you mom! Thank you for everything!
One of the earliest memories I have of my mother is on what I think is my 2nd or 3rd birthday. We were living in the apartments in San Jose. Because it was my birthday – my mother had taken me to the grocery store to pick out a cake mix (she would never in a million years make a cake mix now – and I suspect, that even then, she was doing it because I must have insisted) – any one that I wanted. This decision quite delighted me, and I looked them over with care, and selected the pink cherry cake, with pink cherry frosting. We made the purchase and went home to make the cake – I was completely thrilled – and soon enough, there was a pink two layer cake with pink frosting, and it looked to my untrained eyes just like the one on the box.
This was going to be “good stuff” – Soon there were children assembled to come over to our small home to enjoy my birthday cake with me – Here is the thing about those children, I had no idea who they were. I have no idea to this day how she found them – they must have come from church or something – but they came and sang happy birthday to me, and crowded around the table that we had in that small apartment kitchen – and then it was time to cut the cake – and here is the deal – I don’t like cherry cake, or cherry icing. So my mother had gone to all that trouble to make the cake I wanted for my birthday and I took maybe one bite, and then wasn’t even going to eat it. But she wasn’t even mad at me. It just rolled off her back, and I am sure she laughed about it later.
That is the thing about my mother – she is a planner, and she is excellent at execution, she has great vision and eye, and always knows how to do things the “right” way for the moment, but if it all falls apart – she doesn’t fall apart – she rolls with it. Even as I, or the people who know her best, can watch her mind take a moment – to make it okay in her head. Then it is a smile, and moving on….
My mother……
- Made breakfast for me every day of my entire life until I moved out of the house, and I even then when I come home, she makes breakfast for me. She also made dinner!
- Dropped everything she was doing to come to my side every time I needed her ie: Keaton skiing accident, Kennedy newborn hospitalization or subsequent hospital stays, - I am actually reminded of that Indigo girls song that goes “When I needed my mother and I called her – she stayed with me for days”
- Planned, paid for and executed – not only my first wedding but my 2nd one – and both were absolutely perfect!!
- Makes me laugh!
- Is completely beautiful!
- Always has a calm and peaceful home
- Took me on bus rides, train rides, skiing, hiking and adventures when I was a kid.
- Made my favorite meal for my birthday every year without fail.
- Made my Halloween costumes, and Easter dresses from Scratch and they were always the best.
- Would occasionally pack me a lunch for school, and would always write me little love notes on my napkin to tell me things special about me.
- Thinks I am so funny
- Is the greatest grandmother – she always brings love and new experiences into my children’s lives.
- Used to make play dough and I would have fun with it for hours.
- Has always pursued her passions – and thus – they have become our passions – I have my love of art because of my mother.
- Used to read books to me most nights before bed, even when I was in 5th and 6th grade – I loved sitting with my mother and listening to her read.
- Drove all the way to Pocatello, Idaho and spent the night in a hotel just to see Jorri perform in a play.
- Comes to the kids events; baseball, karate tournament, football, etc.
- Always volunteered to be a room mother at school. She also went to each and every parent teacher conference and made notes and then came home and gave me a “good news is and you need to work on”….briefing
- Always took the collect calls, and difficult calls where I was delivering bad news – and no matter what I said – she still loved me.
- Carpooled to and from, I don’t know how many dance lessons, recitals, performances – swim meets and she was always out in the audience and was always cheering for me.
- Made sure that if there was something that was important to me, that somehow, someway I would get it.
- Took me across the country on 20 dollars a day, and across Europe on 30
- Put up with door slamming, name calling, big attitude, arguing that never seemed to end, entitlement, expectations, and bossy-ness and still loved me.
- Limited the amount of TV I watched and always had wheat bread in the house – because it was good for me.
- Is a great story listener
- Never has a bad thing to say about anyone – which is a good balance to me – because – well we all know that.
- Loves my husband
- Flirts with salesmen that work in retail
- Helped me deliver 2 babies – and raise 3.
- Gave me a roof over my head long after I should have been putting a roof over my own.
- Cries when I cry
- Takes me to the beach every year
- Throws me baby showers, going away, coming home, and “you did it parties”
- Brings me flowers in the hospital
- Gets tickets to the concert, game, event, etc.
- Takes an interest in……
- Worries about me when I travel alone
- Prays for me
- Loves me with her whole heart –
When I was 19 years old – I was definitely the girl who was playing with fire. I was living in Arizona with my friend Jenn Hawkins. I remember going to the grocery store and standing in front of the pregnancy tests and trying to figure out which one to buy. A stranger walked by and recommended one to Jenn and I. Jenn was being strong. She grabbed it – and walked up to the counter and paid. I was in a fog the whole way home to take the test, praying that it would all work out. I remember going into the apartment bathroom and sitting on the toilet and reading the instructions thoroughly – I may have even read them in Spanish – after following them carefully – I put the test on the counter and went out to sit down and watch TV, trying to help my mind stop racing while the time went by. After about 5 minutes – I walked into the bathroom and with major butterflies in my stomach – I looked down at the test. Positive – not even faintly positive – Boldly Positive! It was confirmation of what I already knew – I was going to have a baby. Jenn did her best to console me and give me alternative reasons for the positive – but it was positive – and I knew it in my body.
Without taking even a moment to consider what would happen – I sat down on the couch, grabbed the phone and called my mother.
“Mom?” – (I was starting to feel like I was going to throw up, and not make it through the call)
“Hello Jennifer (excited to hear from me) – How are you?”
“I’m okay – I have something to tell you, and you might want to sit down” – (I was not going to beat around the bush with this – the direct approach is all I had)
“Okay – What is it?”
“I’m pregnant” (There I said it – it’s out there)
“Oh, (pause) Are you okay?”
“I’m really sick mom”
“Uh huh – I actually just came home from a church meeting about unwed pregnancy – so this is perfect timing”
“Okay” – (Me slightly stunned by the direction this had gone)
“Jennifer – It will be okay, we will figure this out, I love you!”
I honestly have no idea how we got off the phone at that point – but two things had happened. I had called my mom and told her the news, and she had heard the news, and still loved me. There was no yelling, no making me feel bad for my decisions, or lack of judgment – just immediate support and love. Without that moment, without that support, I would not have the life and family I have today.
My mother is the blueprint of how to do things right. She is the standard that I hold myself too, and most often come up short. She is the one who’s opinion matters, who I want to make happy and proud. If all the mothers in the whole world were lined up and I could pick any one I wanted. I would pick her, hands down – each and every time – without hesitation, and with my whole heart.
I love you mom! Thank you for everything!
My girls are wondering why I am crying. I guess I don't neither to bother with a Mother's day present :)
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